Monday, June 12, 2017

Beginning to find Life.....




Hi, Everyone!!! I know that title may throw some of you, but when I wrote that I got to thinking how this journey has been since the injury. It has been slow and steady, yes, there have been setbacks and things. God has been there throughout and when I don't feel He's there He shows me in His own way that He is. When I am questioned how I don't always know how to answer so one understands I just know what He does. It is hard to put words because sometimes what we think are the right words to say are the exact opposite in someone else's eyes because they mean something different to them than they do to you. I mean like if I say "I'll have a bulls-eye, thanks." Someone might bring me a target with a hole in the center....that's not what I meant. Someone may say "I'll have an egg-in-a-hole, thanks." These two things mean the same the 'bulls-eye' and 'egg-in-a-hole' - it is a slice of bread with a hole in the center with an egg cooked. The same thing, but the wording is different.

Back to my "Beginning to find life"; I put this title because like I said I have seen changes in what's transpired since this injury. I have seen where I was and where I am now. I am not the same as I was I am changed I am different. You say how it's an injury; simple it's bad in the beginning but as time goes it gets better no big deal. Yea, ok I agree, but this has been a big deal. There has been so much that has happened. I have had people helping me daily, bringing meals, blessing my family when we were at wits ends not knowing what was coming next in this healing from the injury. That didn't matter, what mattered God knew. God knew who He was going to bring here, He knew who was going to bring a meal, He knew my allergy to onions - He knew I didn't have to worry about who brought meals because they knew my allergy. They weren't direct family either, no, they were my church family, my friends.

I say changes, there were challenges, pulling from the comfort zone, and so much more. There were times I felt like I was squashed by "God's Hammer" only close friends of mine will understand that terminology. I am better for it - I know more of what I have to do, what is expected of me. How can I say that? I say that because of what has been brought before me. I still have so much on my plate, am I overwhelmed? If I answered "no" that'd be a lie, if I say "yes" - then some may say don't be dramatic. Whoever said I was, did I say I was being dramatic no? I am calm in this even though there is so much going on right now. I will get through this. Why will I get through this, I will because I have committed my life to Christ. 
Thanks for Stopping,

Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Deep In Thought........




Today has been a wet day with the constant rain coming down. I was looking for a picture to fit with how I have been today. Today I spent most of my time deep in thought. I have been thinking about so many things with all that I am dealing with in this journey of healing. I verse that I thought was from the book of Colossians. Colossians 4:2-3 (NLT) "Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart. Pray for us, too, that God will give us many opportunities to speak about His mysterious plan concerning Christ...." You may ask why this verse...well, I thought of this one because devoting ourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart; God hears us when we pray. He hears us when we pray and spend time with Him; our relationship grows with what He teaches us. Our hearts are more open to receiving what He has for us. I have been finding with this whole injury my spending time in the Word and prayer I have grown in so many ways. I realize that God means for me to be where I am. You think right away I dare to say; how can you say that? I mean seriously! Are you saying that God meant for you to get injured while in that pool for therapy??? No, I am not saying that. I am saying that He may have needed me to slow down and He allowed this.

There are times where God needs us to slow down and hear what He has for us. While getting injured doesn't mean that was the way He wanted me to slow down. It may have taken that because I admit I can be stubborn and push on when I shouldn't. Some circumstances are beyond our control. Sometimes just a card in the mail, a phone call, a knock on the door can throw us for a loop.  We need to be ready for what may come our way.  When we worry about something is us putting question marks where God puts a period. God appreciates when we do His work; what He has planned for us, for you, for me. There are so many ways that God gets our attention to get us to slow down to draw to Him. I am thankful for this time. This has been a long time; we are now five weeks in and I am still not where I need to be physically, but I have grown in so many other ways. 

I have been with four different women from my church. They come certain days of the week to help me at my home, with walking, with making meals for me, for conversation - times of refreshing for them and for me. We talk about things in our lives and share with one another.  They have taught me so much about them and they've said I have taught them so much about me. I have told them some really personal things that I don't share with just anyone. We spent time in prayer; we spent time in tears not always because of sadness, but in times of growth, times of frustration from things of negative anger. There are times that we spend singing our hearts out loudly with the television...hehe so loudly that we rock and roll my husband right out the front door. I hate to admit we laugh when we do that. Is that wrong??? I have to say that it's funny at times watching his reaction when he's going out that door.  In times like these, I have to think of God's glory rather than for my relief.  You may think why wait, how do you do that?? I mean seriously, naturally, we think of questions like these. "How did I get into this mess, and how can I get out?" "How quickly can I solve this problem?" "Why did this have to happen to me?"  That last one is a difficult one, isn't it? I mean when we get hurt, when we get into something that is catastrophic we think how did this happen? Why didn't I stop? Why didn't I see this coming? Sometimes we need to step back. When something comes at us; instead of reacting how we usually do "how can I get out of this mess?". We should change our thinking to "How can God be glorified in this situation. By doing this can change your whole perspective on the situation that you're in. 

When you think about it what comes to your mind? When you think of the enemy what does he do he comes in and bothers us, annoys us. His mission is to seek, kill and destroy. We need to acknowledge when he sneaks in and attacks us...we need to be at the ready and keep our eyes on the Lord. I have kept you here a long time so I will let you go. I thank you for taking the time to read my post. I will have more to write in the days ahead. 
Thanks for stopping by, have a great day,

Monday, June 5, 2017

Long Time No Visit



Greetings Everyone!!! I am sorry that it's been a long, long time since I have been writing. I apologize. I have been trying to get back on my feet and walking again. I am making progress with some setbacks. I am determined to move ahead. I did get some outdoor time even if it was just sitting on the bench outside my home. That's progress because I am not surrounded by the four walls that now feel like a prison. I hate to say it, but I don't want to be a fixture in my living room; in my living room recliner.
While I could focus on what I am not doing yet; I will not and refuse to. I have to say that this time with the challenges that are and were before me was very taxing on my emotions.  When this all began it was some back pain that started this.  I went to the doctor to seek help to find that I was directed to therapy.  I thought I was making the right choice. When I experienced some pain the first day I thought okay this is expected this is something different that I am used to doing. When it transferred over to the second day and continued from there as you know the rest of what happened. I knew then, that I had challenges ahead that haven't happened yet, challenges that I was facing right at that moment. I said that this was very taxing on my emotions. This was; those that came willingly to our home to help me with everyday tasks, personal tasks I am so very grateful and thankful for every moment spent with them. I am not saying that this is a one-way experience. That is not this in any way.  I say that because these were times of refreshing for me and for them. We learned from one another. They learned about me; things that I had experienced in life. I learned things about their lives; things they experienced. This has impacted how I have dealt with and continue to deal with this setback. Setback?! You may say is that what you call it?? It is and it is an injury from the physical therapy as well, but I will get to my goals and ambitions in God's timing. He knows what they are and when they will happen. While others may think that I am wrapped in what I cannot do. I am not while these things do get to my emotions going and I can become overwhelmed at times.  Those times have been fortunate to have been blessed with friends around and them to bring words from God to my heart that some didn't even know that I was struggling with things. I appreciate each one of them that have been here. I am thankful for my husband that the Lord gave me. I say this because of something dear and close to his heart he shared with me during this time of struggle with me. I will not disclose his words here as they were just that dear and close to his heart and not easy for him to share. I have to say that his sharing these words made our relationship even stronger and helped me to see things with him differently in the current circumstances that I am dealing with.

I have to say that today I am doing better, still have a way to come yet. I am getting there. I am not giving in or complaining at all that it's taking this long to get back to where I was. I can say that I am better for the challenges that I have faced already. I am stronger for it as well. I have been in the Word throughout this ordeal. I have been directed to scripture, to books, to other things that friends and family have brought to me. I was also given things from my Pastor during this time as well. He has touched my heart with his encouraging words through this time. He has touched my heart with his sermons as well. I know through this whole process I have grown in many ways. I am thankful for what God is teaching me through this.  I hope that you will stick with me to see how things turn out and where God leads me throughout this challenge. 

Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to read my post and stopping by. Have a wonderful day!!! 

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